I’m in a sassy mood today, and I’ve been looking at online plus-size fashion retailers while trying to help a friend find a dress to wear to a wedding. It’s SO frustrating! Even though the plus-size fashion market has improved, I still see a lot of things that bother me – the most of all being that some labels and manufacturers only consider fit models with a certain body type and don’t pay a thought to those of us who do not have a “classic hourglass shape”. In the spirit of snark and temper tantrums, I bring you “Things I hate about plus-size fashion”!
Fat women are not too lazy to put their own accessories on. This is insulting. Also, the chain is typically full of nickel, which I have an allergy to. It’s gross and insulting, way to go!
Sure, tiny hemlines are progressive, if you slept through the 60s. However, some of us prefer to wear more modest hemlines when we have certain social engagements. Too many retailers are chopping off skirts on otherwise beautiful garments and still charging the same amount.
Tops with bandeau hems or gathered waists
I have a big tummy, there is no way I want to be wrestling with elastic or a thick waist/ hip band all day. There are only two ways these styles work on me – they either slide up to sit under my boobs or down to sit on my thighs. FAIL.
Necklines that ignore my boobs.
This is a double pronged attack – I hate necklines that are too low, and too high. There are LOADS of styles of tops and dresses that incorporate my most hated thing – the cross-over bust. It’s a cheap and nasty manufacturing ploy, because the pattern doesn’t need to be drafted as much to fit the bust through shaping and darts. It means that the neckline basically sits below the bust and shows off miles of your bra if you have larger breasts. Necklines that are too high also bother me. Do I not have a chest? Someone needs to find the Goldilocks solution to this problem so they can have all of my money.
Giant graphic print tops
I have seen so many different abominable prints on plus size clothing ranging from news print to butterflies to “empowering” words. Gross. Get it away from me.
I want to wear plain denim jeans, maybe with a rivet in each corner of the pocket. That’s all. I do not want you to harass my jeans with a bedazzler, sequins, glittery embroidery or your label’s name across my glorious arse.
All of this
Diagonal lines, awful massive prints, sheer fabrics, etc. In the words of my friend “I really despair at TS (Australian label TS14+)”. In the words of me, “It looks like a shitty graphic designer vomited all over her”. Even their cardigans are wonky. It’s insanity.
Obviously, we all have our own list of things we’d prefer not to ever wear – and I’m fairly certain a few people will actually like the garments that bother me so much! What are your fashion hates?